Playing dumb while trying to play smart - Dbanj Case Study

The Sahara Reporters interview with Dbanj was unprofessional. Nonetheless, I enjoy people been caught unaware and Dbanj goofed repeatedly. He failed to manage the short interview. The interview questions were spot on. What can I say, Nigerians won’t forget easily or soon those who had betrayed them. It would have been easy for Dbanj to play neutral even despite his romance with Aso-Rock. It could also have been easy for him to switch back to the peoples’ side. A simple word of ‘sorry’ heals more than any remedy. But Dbanj played dumb while trying to play smart. He requested for a minute silence for those who lost their lives during the Occupy Nigeria struggle and within short seconds denied hearing about the struggle. Come on! One would have thought Dbanj should have behaved maturedly and added value to himself after all these years of musical success. I mean, musical success is not only about jumping about and compiling songs that have no message.

Arguably, some fans find it disturbing why unnecessary attention is centred on Dbanj. Let’s not forget he wasn’t the only one who was involved with this government. Many artistes were much as involved too. Most of them are keeping it cool and calm or staying out of limelight at this period. Most of them also did not participate in the Occupy Nigeria struggle and nobody is even bothered about asking for their position on the same issue.

Dbanj is busy enjoying the fame. His hyperactive nature isn’t doing him much good at this moment. He should have managed his fame with the help of experts who groom public figures on handling the press. Dbanj was a disgrace during those few moments even though Sahara Reporters crossed the ethical line.

What every woman wants

Most women claim they can have a relationship with a guy who loves them but cannot stay in such relationship if the guy doesn’t have enough money to throw around. The two major causes of relationship break-up is lack of satisfaction and inability of most men to meet financial demands of the lady. This is not to say such women demand for so much. Some ladies can be so demanding while so men can be so greedy and shy away from their responsibility.

For anyone to believe or think women crave so much for money is a mistake. Even if it comes from the mouth of some women you still see them ending up with guys who are not as well-off as those they once rejected. The secret to the less wealthy guy winning her heart isn’t his prowess on bed. All women crave for attention and affection. Monetary and material gifts are not show of affections. It may be in some cases but a listening ear does more good than material gifts.

I have met not-too handsome guys win the heart of prettiest of girls which the so-called big boys could not. Every man should come to realize that in a relationship, it isn’t about them but mostly about the lady. Importance shouldn’t be placed on the guy, his wealth or all he can do. Attention should be mostly centred on her. A listening ear does more. A show of affection by asking after every important detail which she never thought you’ll remember does so much magic in her heart.

Have you ever tried playing with her fingers or toes? It doesn’t have to be sex. Be her best friend and even speak to her like she is your male pal who you can share anything with. There is also one big secret I am willing to share; it is sincerity. Do you believe even playboys use sincerity to achieve evil results? There is magic in everything and there is power in our mind.

Dreamers want a ready-made guy while the stupid ones prefer the handsome dude. Smart girls want a guy who progresses gradually and also help them to progress. Real ladies want guys that’ll bring out the best in them. They want a guy who will make them achieve what they never thought of doing.

Women want money but they can wait for you and them to work hard for it. They are not unreasonable and those that look otherwise deserve to be put back on track. Let’s not deceive ourselves that women are always after money. All they want is affection, love and someone with the right mind and prospect.

FLASH NEWS: NEW APPOINTMENTS

In order to consolidate on the achievements made so far by this administration, we have stepped up efforts to identify and engage technocrats and professionals in different fields to solve Nigeria’s multi-faced problem.

Not too long ago the federal government in pursuit of its aim of transformation decided to hand over strategic positions to patriotic Nigerians. Some of such appointment is that of Ex-Militants, Boyloaf, Tompolo and Dokubo. These are Niger- Deltans who have shown in time past, their zeal at making Nigeria peaceful. They have secured lives and properties of numerous multinational oil thieves in the Niger-Delta region. Also, we have not only rewarded lower cadre militants with paid vacation trips tagged educational scholarship, but we have also paid monthly salary to others in our amnesty programmes.

In order to compliment the federal character and to suppress marginalization noise in some quarters, the federal government has decided to engage the services of experts in the area of security and information dissemination. Azazi will make way for Kabiru Sokoto as the new national Security Adviser.  Please don’t be bothered by the frown on Kabiru Sokoto’s face. He was woken up while enjoying his sleep by Maryln. With these appointments all bombings will stop henceforth and MEND and our ruler will stop arguing on who threw the bomb.

There has also been national outcry to put professional and technocrats in their place of expertise; thus Labaran Maku will henceforth organise praise-singers for the president and will also be in charge of amusing the presidency. Taking his place will be Abul Qaqa. I don’t need to blow Abul Qaqa’s horn. His Curriculum Vitae says it all.

The government won’t rest on its oars to identify and engage talented Nigerians. This is part of the drive to create a million jobs in the next few months. We urge all Nigerians not to send resumes but show their ‘evil’ talents. We can assure you that we notice everyone.

Why Nuhu Ribadu got it wrong

Staying away from the country doesn’t necessarily mean you lose touch with developments in the country. No one needs to tell Nuhu Ribadu that there was no meaningful development since the day this present government took the reins of power. The government has only grown unpopular each day. The appointment of technocrats and ‘men of integrity’ have failed to bring succour to the people.

But someone needs to tell Nuhu Ribadu that the only development which is not associated with government is the level of enlightenment and participation of the people. During Nuhu Ribadus sojourn in the desert, so many youths in Nigeria have engaged themselves in information sharing which has spurred us to ask question. Yet the government has failed to give reasonable answers.

Nuhu Ribadu needs to be told that the likes of Sanusi lamido Sanusi who we once respected got has the CBN complicit in fuel subsidy corruption. Ribadu should ask how Madam-President Ngozi Okonjo-Iweala embarrassed herself at the on-going probe in the national assembly. Perhaps Ribadu should ask how Diezani Alison-Madueke lied claiming to be under oath. These set of people are the best product the current administration can boast of. What became of them today?

In order to win trust of the people, Belgore and Christopher Kolade were adopted to head committees. Illegal committees. If Nuhu doesn’t know, the mere fact that such men of credibility accepted such illegal responsibility made the people lose all respect for them. Now in a bid to redeem an unredeemable credibility, the government decides to bring in a Ribadu.

Did Ribadu ever ask if his committee has duplicated responsibility? I bet he, Ribadu ignored that question. Will Ribadu be able to prosecute all erring officer including his boss Diezani Alison-Madueke? I bet he can’t. The only committee which ought to be set up is a committee to study the report of KPMG, implement necessary recommendation and bring all culpable officers to book. Oh my God! I just mentioned committee too. That’s simply because we have all lost faith in all relevant agencies and ministries. In fact we lost faith in the government.

All my opinions give me some leads. The first is that Ribadu has just been a chameleon claiming to be upright. Because till today I did not see any prominent public officer successfully prosecuted by him during his years has EFCC boss. I will also look at it from another angle. Probably he is just a political ‘ashewo’ who is ready to work with any government in power. Or how do you explain Mitt Romney working under Obamas administration? Thirdly, maybe he truly wants to serve his fatherland not minding if he will succeed or not.

This is a time to wish Nuhu Ribadu well on his new appointment which I refuse to call national service .i pray we the critics, your fans, GEJ sympathizers and every other well-meaning Nigeria live longer than Boko Haram bombs to witness your tale after.

God bless Nigeria

English FA and people finally got their wish

English FA successfully forced out Fabio Capello. I don’t understand why Luis Suarez who was accused of allegedly abusing Evra was banned for 8 games while John Terry with similar offence has to wait for a court prosecution in July.
It was with shock I received the news that Terry has been stripped of captaincy by the English FA. Logically, i expected any action that will be taken will have to wait till after Court Judgement. I was more bewildered when Fabio Capello went against the FA publicly. I feel the FA undermined a Capello who they knew wants a total control on his team. They knew he could not permit interference from the Football Association in his work.
Incidentally the resignation of Capello came same day the long trial of prospective successor came to an end. It was the same day Harry Redknap was cleared of any crime of tax evasion.
Perhaps everything happened and fell in place at the right time. I expect the FA to speed up the hiring of their home grown coach. I expect little resistance from Tottenham management cause delay might affect England’s chances in Euro 2012 . Other chain reactions include Arsenal finishing the league with more points than Tottenham; Luka Modric finally leaving for Chelsea; Gareth Bale also leaving for another bigger club and Emmanuel Adebayor permanently moving to Tottenham. So what makes you think Nigeria isnt like its old master? 

Valentines gift for my children

At first it may be a bitter experience to my family. I’ll have to call my children to a meeting and break the news i have been keeping a secret. I have a girlfriend.......and I intend proposing marriage to her this valentine’s day. I know sweat will break from foreheads. They probably will think it’s a joke. Some might get irritated but these are words I’ve been rehearsing for so long and I can’t keep the secret anymore.
I expect one or all of them to take the news to their mother, my wife. I am darn sure what her reaction will be. They'll break the news to her and to their surprise she sighs in relief. Does it mean she doesn’t love dad anymore? The children will ask each other. My wife will tell them 'I knew all along your dad was having an affair'. Bewildered look on the children’s faces. Then they ask 'do you know he'll propose to her very soon?' Her response will be ' I have been expecting that to happen'. Your dad is a Muslim and he is entitled to more than a wife. Your dad loves you, i love you and you can do with an extra love again. The children turn to their mom angrily ' what makes you think the home-breaker will love us?
Enough of the drama. My wife and I will be renewing our vows this valentine and it will come with some practical jokes on the kids. They are growing fast, not only are they keeping secrets from us but also ganging up to play pranks on us. Thus we also want to show them we can also play their game, but in a beautiful way.

Music, musicians and weeds

From a tender age I had always loved music. If you have never felt that wave of excitement flow through your body then you don’t understand what good music is. At various point in my life I have listened and loved different genres. I can’t ever forget the jazz being played by Rhythm 93.7fm years ago. There was also a time Fela was in my system. Hip-hop, rhythm and blues are all part of my collection

Despite my love for music, the architects of such beautiful art haven’t impressed me with their personal attitudes except for just a few. I won’t fail to point out that i stereotyped almost all musicians to be eccentric. I stand to be corrected that most musical artiste especially hip-hop artiste can’t survive without tinge of madness in them. I won’t call names but majority of the ones I met personally only confirmed my thinking.

I won’t ever forget one of the short-lived superstars who messed up his career on a national TV. He was so high on marijuana and practically made a fool of not himself alone but others. So many other prominent ones who are still in the limelight are been associated with weeds. Some even make songs that share their love for weeds.

Musical artistes who once held sway in the entertainment industry but today have vanished into oblivion were directly or indirectly ruined by their love and dependence on hard drugs. These once popular artiste whose careers took a nose-dive won’t have the opportunity of advising their fans of dangers of such hard drugs. Simply because the command, respect and attention their music once brought them is dies. 

Love and valentine

Love comes in different shapes and sizes. It takes different form and expressed in different ways. Romantic couples will kiss to express love while some other passionate ones will quarrel over small issues and later reconcile to strengthen their love.

The gifts given on this day depends on how rich, romantic or matured you are. . Going through my memoirs of the characters I have encountered in my journey in life; I have come across some bizarre valentine day’s gifts.

Gifts ought to be shared occasionally by loved ones. Most lovers only give gifts during the wooing season. To these less enlightened people it is the only day one should buy a gift for his/her spouse. 

The semi-literates and illiterates use this day to take their family to fast-food outlets (so romantic). You can see them in ‘aso-ebi’ on queues in crowded fast food joints.

You also see some hopelessly romantic ones purchasing roses which the average Nigerian lady doesn’t appreciate. I’ll advice all ‘maga must pay’ to stay away from ladies who haven’t shown them the green light ever since but till this month.

I am wishing everyone love and happiness, today and forever. I can’t wait till valentine’s day to do this because every day comes with the magic of love. Stay away from AIDS. Share the love not the virus.

Government paying lip service to insecurity

Could this government be really serious about tackling the menace of Boko Haram? This question is as a result of statement and sometimes action of government. The statement ‘that we should get used to the bombing’ shouldn’t have come from Nigeria’s number one citizen. He clearly told us that he wasn’t in charge of our security. In civilized nations, such statement is enough to make the president resign. It points to the fact that he isn’t capable of responsibilities we elected him to do.


Perhaps in order to restore confidence or probably attempts to show the government is working they called on the terrorist group to step out of the shadows to negotiate and make its demands known. A few days after this call for dialogue, the Government owned TV station (NTA) which has successfully remained behind in information dissemination claimed it received a tape from Boko Haram. The tape showed two masked guys who named some individuals as Boko Haram negotiators. It is important to note that there were reported multiple bomb blasts in some states in which the group claimed responsibility for that same day. How could a group that wants to negotiate still be terrorizing?


No one actually trusts NTA and to confirm that, Boko Haram dissociated itself from the tape aired by NTA. Also Boko Haram usually uses YouTube to pass its message across. Perhaps the group have been divided, or some people are trying to cash in on governments move for dialogue. That tape needs to be properly investigated by the State Security Service.


If the government is truly sincere in its bid for dialogue, the FG can negotiate with people the president claimed are Boko Haram members who work in his government. I am sure he can identify them, that’s why he spoke out about them. If the president is too scared to point them out, we have Ndume a senator representing Boko Haram senatorial district. Negotiate with him. Bring in Abu Darda or Abu Qaqa. Bring in Zakari Biu who I feel must have a link with them for releasing Kabiru Sokoto.


There is no reason waiting for more of them to come out since the government can negotiate with the ones already identified. 

Fighting corruption the wrong way

The last has not been heard of the chain effect of the fuel price increase of January 1^st 2012. The astronomical amount the governments claims it spends on subsidy has been found to be false. Revelations from the Faruk Lawan lead committee has been nothing but revealing. Ministries and parastatals headed by so called ‘technocrats’ have been found milking the nation.

The KPMG report ought to have been used to clear all the mess but a lot of big-wigs will lose their position. It was quite shameful when the minister for petroleum, Diezani Alison-Madueke (DAM) claimed she hasn’t read the report on official capacity. Does she need presidential approval before reading it? Yet, she could set up different committees with duplicate responsibilities of other parastatals.

It is important to note that such committees which were made up of former opposition will run at extra cost which wasn’t provided for in the 2012 budget. A typical example is NEITI which had been in existence to do what exactly what one of the committee is expected to do.

All the committees set up by Diezani Allison Madueke is just a move to throw the KPMGs report into the bin. Obviously she has a case to answer concerning the reckless withdrawal of money from the treasury to pay for unjustified subsidy. There have been clamours for her to step down in order to have a thorough investigation of her ministry which she has been trying desperately to ignore.

Diezani Alison-Madueke can never be a judge, plaintiff, defendant and even witness in her own case. For anyone to think the appointment of Nuhu Ribadu will clean up the system is mistaken. He is answerable to DAM and the success of his assignment may be restricted to favour her. 

Hitting the Wrong Note II

GEJ and his advisers keep getting it wrong. The government is more concerned with getting the trust of the people than actually succumbing to the peoples. The basics (power, security, food etc) are what Nigerians lack.  And to make governance easy, Nigerians don’t want more than these basics at least for now. Music is enjoyable but when we don’t have a good blend of the musical instrument it becomes noise. Our government at every time is hitting the wrong note thus making their music a cacophony of sound to the people.

The administration till today is still finding its feet. How long will it take for them to get rolling? Many months of inactions and shadow chasing has yielded no meaningful plan. Several illegal committees are being setup by the government without any provision from the budget. A government running on illegality which wants the peoples support - rather than address issues provoking the people, the government keeps searching for perceived people of integrity to man illegal positions.

The administration decides to ignore the extravagant spending on itself which has continually irk the people, yet it is forcing the people to sacrifice. They employ different methods to seek approval of the people. Presentation of false figures did not appeal to the people. Emotional plea from madam president (NOI) got no result but the brutal use of force was the only weapon an unpopular government can use to gain acceptance.

Nigerians have been brutally raped by their rulers and all goodwill is lost. Recruiting perceived men of INTEGRITY won’t add to the credibility of present government of GEJ. We have been robbed of our right. We were molested by the governments with its tool of oppression which includes the Army and NPF. The government itself started the war against its people. There are two sides to the war and no middle way.


Read: Hitting the Wrong Note 1

Legalized criminality

The national union of road transport Workers in Lagos could be said to be a dreaded body because of the violence they portend of unleashing anytime they so wish. The recent fracas in Lagos between two major factions of the union has claimed more than five life’s according the reports in newspapers.

The Lagos state government which is usually prompt in quashing any act of protest, even if it’s a peaceful one has time without number tolerated the excesses of this union. The average lagosians knows the political elites in Lagos use these unions and its violent members as instrument of oppression during elections and also to intimidate oppositions. This was the same people used against the peaceful protesters in Ajah against the toll gate.

The union leaders are thus stakeholders in Lagos, because I still can’t find a reason why their leaders can’t be arrested for destruction of properties and threatening public peace. Lagos has a time bomb underneath ready to explode anytime. Visiting the garages you’ll see the foot soldiers of these unions who act and look criminal, they obtain tolls indirectly from Lagosians through commercial motorist.

Whenever a new administration comes into power without the violent intimidation of this union; whenever a new administration decides to get rid of the menace of these miscreants called unions, we will have an increase in rate of armed robbery and other vices in Lagos. Until then, let’s continue to accommodate criminals in green and white uniforms molesting us day by day.

Boiling Point

Boiling point is where the otherwise tolerant or docile animal reaches and then snaps towards violence. The erupting violence at this point may not be under control thus the mind of the individual will be irrational. Pains and hurt from previous encounters re-surface and emotions blow out of proportion. Nigerians almost got to this point during the first few weeks this year.

Though praise-singers of Nigeria’s presidential ruler termed the gathering of angered and disappointed Nigerians has a jamboree. A nation that went through the harrowing experience of civil war doesn’t want to go through the same experience anymore. The veterans of the civil war caution the youths of the devastating effects of the war. The nation is divided amongst greedy populace who prefer individual solution than for a collective effort to move the nation forward. The ruling class and political elites have amassed so much wealth meant for the generality thus they can break any efforts by the people to liberate themselves.

The educational system is in ruins and the poor people who live below poverty level have to pay international price for lowest quality service and goods. We only heard stories of when our nation was so good, we never experienced it. Instead successive governments have fed us promises which have never been fulfilled.

Its unfortunate the present government is not trusted and the people see it just like its predecessors. The government cannot absolve itself of such blame because almost most of the people who make up this government have been part of the past government at one level or another promising what they never delivered.

Fela Anikulapo said it all-‘suffering and smiling’. We are not smiling anymore but we are still suffering. But I can assure you, Nigerians haven’t gotten to that point where they have no option but to fight back. We haven’t gotten to the point when we won’t listen to voice of reasoning. When eventually we get there, I can see the oppressors absconding to foreign countries. I can see some others being given the jungle justice. It is not only the oppressors who will pay dearly, but I see those who sit on the fence also paying too. Its either you stand for truth or against it. There is no middle way.

For the oppressors, continue to enjoy your largesse. The judgement day isn’t today or tomorrow but I know it’s moving in faster than I envisage. If you can’t see it, call on an average man on the street.

Boko Haram and Islam

Terrorism in the world today is always usually attributed to Muslims. So many extremist and fanatics have chosen violence as a means to get attention which shouldn’t be so. Suicide bombing and mass killing of innocent people is their way. Since the beginning of the administration of GEJ, the trend of suicide bombing which was alien to Nigeria appeared on our home front.

Rather than nip it in the bud, our government told us to bear with it until they (Boko Haram) get tired or run out of suicide bombers. They fail to realize that the spate of killings and bombings cannot be funded by the poor. It is capital intensive.

Differentiating between Islam and Boko Haram should be something an average Muslim should do. The reverse is the case, because I see even some Christians will tell you why Boko Haram is a political weapon but not a religious sect. The western media isn’t helping matters by always calling the sect ‘Islamic’. They go far enough by dividing Nigerians as Muslim north and Christian south. This shows they know little about us or they are desperately seeking for a division of Nigeria.

Right from the name ‘Boko Haram’, down to its ideology, operations and demands, it shows they can and will never be islamic. Not only does Islam make seeking knowledge important on every Muslim, it forbids the killing of innocent people either Muslims, Christians or any other religion.

If a Christian says it shameful if we don’t know that Boko Haram isn’t Islamic. Any Muslim who can’t convince any other person that Boko Haram isn’t Islam should cover his eyes in shame.